Star Author Still Being Difficult – Sigh.

Oh, the pressure.
If I was willing to share tips with you (which I’m not, remember? I don’t want you all becoming bestselling authors and stealing my book space on the shelves) well, if I was willing I would probably suggest a brainstorm.
But I won’t.
Another thing, I would probably say … look at newspaper headings for inspiration, write lists like ‘the five most embarrassing things that ever happened to me’ or start with a picture that sparks your interest.
Hmmm, my most embarrassing memory, story book related … I dressed up as Heidi and got stage fright. I had to be taken off the stage in floods of tears. (I was seven, just to be clear. This wasn’t last week visiting schools, I don’t care what you’ve heard. How do these rumours get started?)
Oh wait. I just wrote something. That counts as a blog post, doesn’t it? And I didn’t share any valuable information. Excellent, I really do enjoy being so completely unhelpful. I am the world’s worst star author and I’m loving it.
(Cue evil laughter and the silent screams of shocked librarians. What does silent screaming sound like? How should I know? It’s silent.)
Now, how about a list of the ‘five worst things I ever did’? Let’s see, did I tell you about the time I blew up the science lab … oh wait, I’m all out of time.
Maybe in the next blog.

1 Response so far

  1. 1

    Tierney said,

    I think you’re the best worst star author ever! I also agree that writing lists is a great way to start writing.

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